Tyrod Taylor is Dead to Me. Nathan Peterman Rises From His Ashes.

That was me just two games ago. I was excited to watch the Bills take on the lowly New Jersey Jets, but that excitement soon turned to pain. I watched as Tyrod Taylor missed open recievers and was sacked countless times. Some people want to blame the offensive line for those sack, but I say that it was Tyrod holding on to the ball for-fucking-ever that exhausted them.  Before the game was finished I declared the team dead to me and the season over.

A few days later, I resuscitated the Buffalo Bills; after all, I can’t go to the game of a dead team. I figured that the Jets game was a fluke; surely they will play better this week against the Saints. Now I didn’t think for a second that the Bills would win this game, but I was hoping for a sign of life. Sure enough, it was the same shit as the last game. The second that New Orleans went up 14-3, I knew the game was over. Tyrod is a timid little coward that can’t lead a comeback from even a relatively small deficit. Fast forward to the start of the fourth quarter. The Bills are getting stomped on in a stadium that is already less than half filled, Tyrod has completed a whopping 57 passing yards, and I once again declare that the Buffalo Bills are dead to me. It was time to begin the disapointing walk out of the stadium.

Not long after exiting New Era Field, I hear a voice booming from the heavens. It says to me: “Nathan Peterman entering the game at quarterback. ” I think to myself: “Is that The Undertaker’s music?!” Just like that,  the team rises from the dead. I rush back to the car so that I can listen to my boy, Peterman lead the team down the field for their only touchdown of the day.

After the game, Coach McDermott is adamant that Tyrod Taylor is their starter. I feel a bit sick, but understand that he kind of has to say that; there is still hope. Monday, Coach once again says that Tyord is the team’s starter. I start to think that it’s all over, that I would have to watch Tyrod Taylor choke away the rest of this season. My dreams of a real quarterback were dead. It was on Wednesday that something changed. The world was shocked when it was finally announced that Nate Peterman would indeed be starting the next game. On the third day, the Bills rose from the dead, led by our savior Peterman.

My sane take:

Those of you that know me, know that I have never really been a Tyrod fan. He seems like a good guy/leader, and certainly a talented athlete, but he is not a great QB. He holds on to the ball too long. He throws the ball at his receivers feet too often. He has terrible vision on the field. This team needs a quarterback that is good in the pocket that can get the ball out of his hands. I think Peterman can get the job done. If he goes in there and sucks, well at least I feel like the team tried and they can draft another QB early next draft.

My more sane take:

The fake news media is trying to tell you that it is crazy to bench Tyrod while the Bills are still in a playoff spot. I say that’s poppycock, Tyrod is a bum. I’m right, they’re wrong. They’re always wrong. You want the truth, you come to GritnessSports.com and listen to The Gritcast (Now Available on itunes.) No one, outside of Bills fans, watches Bills games; they have no idea what the fuck they are talking about! I keep hearing that Tyrod Taylor has the lowest interception rate in NFL history. Yeah, when you don’t take any risks at all, that’s not hard. You need to take risks to win in this league! Tyrod is always running scared! Some people are claiming that everyone loves Tyrod after a win and hates him after a loss. Those people are morons! The right answer is that Tyrod sucks all the time! Ten Touchdowns in nine games is NOT good! There are only four quarterbacks in the league with at least ten touchdowns and three or less picks:  Tom Brady, Alex Smith, Aaron Rodgers, and Tyrod Taylor. What a convenient little stat! Big difference is that Brady, Smith, and Rodgers have 19, 18, and 13 (In 6 games!) TD’s respectively to Taylor’s 10! They had to lower the bar so fucking far to fit Tyrod into that stat. Have no idea why people are so in love with the guy. I’m done! He’s dead to me, but the Buffalo Bills have just bought themselves sometime with me.

Bring on Peterman! Bring on the playoffs!



Leave a Reply

Fill in your details below or click an icon to log in:

WordPress.com Logo

You are commenting using your WordPress.com account. Log Out /  Change )

Google photo

You are commenting using your Google account. Log Out /  Change )

Twitter picture

You are commenting using your Twitter account. Log Out /  Change )

Facebook photo

You are commenting using your Facebook account. Log Out /  Change )

Connecting to %s